I'm tired. borderline exhausted.

It's so hard to balance the back and forth between the future, reality, and the side worlds in which I lose myself.

Day to day I'm reminded of where I really am. And mourn the loss of my fantasies.


I don't want to go back to LA. I don't want to see the carpet and the walls and the elevator and the hallways. I don't want to be there again.

I've said my last goodbyes and going back feels like returning forever.