Today I feel at a loss. Misplaced. Like something just isn't right. uneasy.

I get this feeling often. So I won't give any importance to it.

I think it's masked hunger, homesickness, over slept petualentcy, and government aimed anger.

Don't ask. long story and maybe just a mood.

But still the resounding question is...

what am i doing with my life?

It sounds like only an excuse but i wouldreally like to pick a profession or field that in 30 - 40 years I won't regret. And i feel like my long term happiness and life satisfaction depend on my choices now.

And I reallly reallllly don't want to fuck this up.

MOst people don't put all this pressure on themselves. But if i don't have a plan or a "what to do next" i feel like i'm failing. I feel like it's ok to change paths and it's ok to take steps back occassionally. I think it's ok to be slow going.... as long as you know where you're going. what you're heading to. what the long term plan is. which is really just product of my parent's being proud of the goal oriented person they raised. but now i'm goalless.

i'm another one of those people that i just never wanted to be.